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Old 04-20-2009, 07:18 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default How To Attract Your Ideal Mate

We all want to attract our ideal mate...The question is HOW do we do that.

HOW TO ATTRACT YOUR IDEAL MATE!!!!!

Remember 20 years ago when that magazine article came out declaring that if you
were 40 years old and had never been married you were “more likely to be killed
by a terrorist” than to get married? If you remember that, how did it affect
you? I know some women who went into a frenzied panic. That statement wasn't
even true. It's what's known as a cultural myth. Cultural myths can have a big
impact.

I’m telling you all of this because I want you to be aware of how our
backgrounds and the cultural conditioning can affect our lives and what we
create as a result of those ingrained and self-limiting beliefs. It is so there
we don’t even know it exists. It is like the air we breathe. Similar to the
backdrop of a set that appears so real in dimension and perspective that we take
it as the real thing.

When you can name your own self-limiting beliefs – you see them for what they
are – then you can recreate them. You create after the image and likeness of
your Creator. You were made in the image and likeness of the Creator, Unbounded
Energy, Infinite Love.

Let me be clear here. You do not have to be married or even in a relationship to
be self-actualized. I assume you're reading this because you are ready to get
straight with yourself and acknowledge that something about yourself and
relationship isn't working. If you want the relationship of your dreams, then
you get to say so. You get to create it exactly as you specify. It will be your
relationship by design.

First, you absolutely must know what your self-talk and cultural conditioning
is, what your limiting beliefs are, and take responsibility for that and your
personal stories to get to the bottom of why s/he is not here yet. No excuses.

TAKE YOUR PULSE

It is important to note that thoughts can be very subtle. You know the
background chatter that is almost always there? In the case of a friend of mine,
it is always there and it is her mother’s voice telling her what she should be
doing. We’ve all been around people with small children who are whining about
something, but the parents have learned to press their internal mute button.
We’ve learned to studiously ignore the chatter in our own heads, but it’s still
playing and it’s running us. What you resist (even if you are still unaware)
persists.

That underlying theme is so prevalent that you can’t even hear it. Much like
blocking out background noise, it comes to the forefront whenever an upset
arises and spills out in a disproportionate measure to the circumstance. Upsets
and irritations, seemingly unrelated to the incident, are a sure clue that
something is amiss – something that you’ve habitually glossed over and not paid
attention to.

These thought and feeling tones are emitting frequencies and are unceasingly
creating, or they keep the status quo in place by recreating the same thing over
and over and over again.

On the other hand, thoughts that don’t have much conviction and have not been
repeatedly conditioned don’t have much impact and therefore have a weaker charge
in making an impression on the universe.

WHERE ARE YOU NOW?

Taking stock of where you are now will help you determine how to get to where
you want to be. Be dispassionate about it, and avoid self-blame or guilt. Treat
it as information. You’ll be learning to shift your vibration more efficiently
once you are clearer on where you now stand.

THOUGHTS REALLY DO BECOME THINGS

Years ago, when I’d get an undesired or unpleasant thought, I’d quickly say
“cancel-cancel” in an attempt to push that thought away. Or I would paste
affirmations over my negative feelings or thoughts.

You can say affirmations ‘til the cows come home, and it won’t make a difference
if the thought doesn’t match up with a feeling tone frequency. When spoken
without an emotion-centered conviction, affirmations are just words.

You must access how it will feel when Mr. or Ms. Scrumptious shows up. How will
it feel when s/he comes up and puts her/his arms around you?

Furthermore, saying affirmations such as: “I am now ready for my soul mate to
show up,” “I am grateful for the love of my life, right now,” and so on, if said
with the undercurrent emotions of “Oh yeah, when will that be?” or “I hope this
is going to work,” “Gosh I’ve been at it for 3 weeks now, where is he?” simply
projects back to the Universe “s/he’s not here, not here, not here. . .” and
just like the genie in The Secret, “your wish is my command,” and so it is. . .
“S/He’s not here!”

We are talking about the relationship of your dreams not just another form of
what you have already had. So you really need to clean up your thoughts and
feelings around this topic.

You must get straight with yourself about how you truly feel underneath it all.
Have you noticed the emphasis on feeling? This point cannot be overstated.
Granted some of it is actually below the level of awareness. For that reason we
need others to help show us what we fail to see.

It is always a good idea to get some expert coaching in the matter. You know how
easy it is to see the shortcomings in another’s life when they complain about
how their life is not working. Well, it is time to get uncompromising with
yourself.

Check in with your feelings frequently. Your emotions are you inner guidance
telling you whether you are moving in the direction of manifesting your desire
or pointed in the opposite direction. You may not always be able to catch your
thoughts, but you always know how you feel. The way you feel is the true measure
of your vibration and much more accurate than your words.

If you know where you are vibrationally and you know where you want to be, all
you have to do is start bridging your beliefs toward better feeling thoughts and
start getting more of what you've been wanting in your life and relationships.

Exaclty HOW do I build that bridge from where I am to where I want to be
(vibrationally?)

It's really quite simple. Although simple doesn't necessarily mean easy!

First, as the article suggest - you want to take your pulse and really look at
where you are. Take time to sit down with your journal and answer questions
that provoke self-knowledge and awareness.

When it comes to attracting your ideal relationship, for example, consider
brainstorming around the following. (Now, for this exercise - forget everything
you know about positive thinking and get down and dirty with your REAL feelings,
beliefs, and thoughts.)

In regards to my relationship life... (complete the following statements):

What are my expectations?

I expect dating to be...
I expect men/women that I'm attracted to, to be...
I expect I will have to...
I expect to be....(state your emotional thoughts that come up.)
I expect my partner to...
I expect my satisfaction level will be...
I expect I'll have to change by...
I expect my partner (or future partner) will not be....

In regards to being alone...

What are my fears?

I'm afraid...
I'm fearful that my mate will...
I'm fearful that others judge me as..
I'm fearful that if I get a mate, I'll have to give up...
I'm fearful that if I choose to date, then I'll be compromising on...
I'm fearful that I'm not....
I'm fearful that I'll never...
I'm fearful that I'll sabotage.... by...
I'm fearful that my past will replay by...
I'm fearful that anyone that is attracted to me will be...

What are my self-sabotaging behaviors?

I sabotage my dreams by...
I sabotage my opportunities by...
When I ______________, I sabotage myself because _____________
When I meet someone that I'm attracted to, I sabotage the relationship because
_______________
When I become afraid of actually having a meaningful relationship, I sabotage it
by___________

The above questions are just a few examples. Your work is to spend time in
meditation and reflection, truly getting to know your inner thoughts, feelings,
and beliefs. It's impossible to attract what you REALLY want, when underneath
that desire is a more subversive (and unfortunately more pronounced) fear or
limiting belief that sits in silence sabotaging your dreams. Thus,
self-reflection and a willingness to go within to look at your inner thoughts is
necessary to properly manifest your ideal relationship.

SPEAK LOVE, VIBRATE LOVE, SEE LOVE, NO ONE CAN LOVE LIKE YOU DO.

And there is someone just for you to share that powerful LOVE you have.

With Love
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