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A Secret Women Know but Men Don't

By: David DeAngelo

 

 

I'd like to tell you a tale...

It's a story that you might find oddly familiar. Don't be worried.

Once upon a time, there was a man who was extremely attracted to a particular woman.

At first, she was just another every-day type attractive woman... but the more he got to know her, the more he began to feel attracted to her... and the more time he spent with her, the more that attraction grew into a profound emotional connection and affection for her.

But there was one dilemma.

As his emotional attachment grew stronger and stronger, he also grew more and more anxious.

Why?

Because he couldn't tell whether or not she felt the same way about him.

Sometimes she would utter things like "You are so important to me" and "I'm happy that you're in my life"... but nothing ever progressed past the “friendship" phase.

There were rare hugs, an infrequent kiss on the cheek from her... and once she even held his hand for a long time while he talked about an emotional topic.

But something was incorrect with the picture.

She just wasn't acting like a woman that was “falling in love". She was acting like a buddy.

The insecurity that he felt became a spiral that enlarged itself... and the more insecure he became, the more frightened he grew of "screwing things up" by kissing her or asking her to be his girlfriend.

Plus, the more self-doubting he became, the less time she seemed to want to spend with him.

After spending many days and nights obsessing over this woman, the man at last arrived at the conclusion that if she only knew how HE FELT, that she would feel the same way.

So he made a brave move.

He TOLD HER how he felt about her.

He confessed that he was in love, and that he would do anything and everything to be with her.

She looked at him with sympathy in her eyes and said "Thank you... I really mean that... but I don't want to mess up our friendship... you’re too significant to me...”

This only puzzled the man more.

He didn't make out how to take it...

Did it mean that she really loved him too, but that she was scared of something?

Did it mean that she wasn't prepared for a lasting relationship?

Did it imply that she didn't love him, but that she was trying to give him a clue?

Did it represent that he hadn't tried hard enough?

Did it mean that he needed to put it all on the line and REALLY let her know how he feels?

He at last decided that he couldn't go on like this any longer... he had to be with her.

He had to make sure that she knew just how much he wanted to be with her... so he took a huge step, bought for her a symbolic gift, and wrote her a extensive, long letter... again confessing his feelings about her.

And then the impossible happened.

She didn't respond.

He called her three times a day for roughly a week before reaching her.

She created an excuse about being very busy, and said "I'll try to give you a call soon, I have to go"... and hung up the phone...

...but he never got a call back.

Over the subsequent months, the man tried badly to understand what went wrong... and what happened.

THE END

OK, I'm back.

Now, wasn't that a cute story?

Heart melting, huh?

I know, I should stick with my day job, and not take-up writing romance novels...

Now, let's speak about that story.

That story is essentially a MYTH.

And I am not talking about FICTION here.

I'm talking about a story that rings true for a great mass of men. A story that is undying. A story that resonates at a profound level because you can IDENTIFY with it.

And why does this particular story resonate for nearly all men?

Because we've all been there in one way or another... at one time or another... and many of us have been there over and over again in our lives.

Another thing that gives this particular story a lot of power is the controlling negative emotions that it stirs... as a result of the powerful depressing experiences that it reminds us of...

Stories and situations like this one actually FASCINATE me.

They fascinate me because I see them as a chance to UNDERSTAND and SOLVE the puzzles that they symbolize.

In this particular circumstance I think there is an answer.

And it lies in comprehending a secret that women know but MEN DON'T.

And that secret comes down to the realism that if a woman isn't ATTRACTED to a man, all of his attempts to confess his love, persuade her to like him, and court her BACKFIRE.

In other words, they not only DON'T WORK, they really make things WORSE.

In other words, the very things that a man does to try to make a woman be attracted to HIM make her NOT like him. They make her run.

All those great intentions and emotional enthusiasm actual cause the man feeling them to do things that make her go away.

It sucks.

And I hope that by clearing up the process of how this happens to you I'll help you avoid this aching situation in your own future...

THE "INSTANT EWWW"

I'm always captivated by the idea that we humans don't always appreciate the message that we’re communicating to others...

So often we think that because we WANT to communicate a message that others are going to NATURALLY understand what we're attempting to say.

Have you ever seen a man in a foreign car that has rims on it that cost more than the car itself... with his stereo system blasting... and a muffler that somehow AMPLIFIES the raw noise of the 4-cylinder motor...?

Have you ever thought to yourself "I don’t think that car is communicating the point to women that he thinks it is"...?

Yea, I have too.

Well here's the deal:

If you do something to "let a woman know how you feel"... but she isn't ATTRACTED to you, then it’s going to boomerang.

It's going to set off a feeling that I like to call the "Instant Ewww".

The Instant Ewww is just as dominant as the physical and emotional reaction of ATTRACTION.

Once a woman feels it, YOU'RE DONE.

It's over.

It's like pounding a RAILROAD SPIKE into the coffin.

Once a woman feels the Instant Ewww, she will start acting differently.

In short, she'll disappear.

So where did I get the idea of the "Instant Ewww"?

I got it from WOMEN.

I have actually heard quite a few women use the word "Ewww" when telling how they felt about a guy that was "confessing his love"... of course, these were guys that weren't loved in return.

So what causes the Instant Ewww?

And why would a woman feel it towards a man who was just attempting to be nice... a guy who was giving her a gift or telling her how he feels?

Because if you think about it from HER point of view, you'll realize that the moment you do something to "confess", you have shaped a TURNING POINT in the relationship.

Up until that point, you were risk-free.

I mean, women always know how men feel.

She already knew you wanted her.

She knew it from the very start.

But now that you've began pursuing her and talking about how you feel, you've produced a NEGATIVE TENSION that is VERY uncomfortable.

You've triggered an emotion that is disgusting to women. And it does repel them.

In summary...

You can't "make a woman like you" or "alter how she feels about you" by doing kind things for her...

Doing "nice" things for a woman who isn’t attracted to you HURTS you. It WILL backfire. Worse, it creates the "Instant Ewww" emotion that makes it so she'll NEVER like you.

Men make this slip-up over and over again in life because they're doing what MAKES SENSE to them. They're doing it because they don't understand the concept of ATTRACTION.

I mean, if you have a friend, and you like them, and you crave for them like you more...and you do some nice thing for them, they will most likely like you more.

On the other hand...

If you have a woman that you "like" in a passionate way, and she doesn't "feel it" for you, and you do something kind for her because you want HER to like you more, it will BACKFIRE... and she will not only NOT like you more, she will almost certainly distance herself from you.

Guys believe that they need to communicate when they like a woman... as if that's part of the essential process of getting a girl.

In their minds, it goes like this:

Like her>Let know her you like her>She likes you

Well bear in mind... if you follow this blueprint yourself with women who aren't ATTRACTED to you, then it's going to BACKFIRE.

If she's not into you, then it goes like THIS:

She thinks of you as a friend>you tell her how you feel about her>She gets the "Instant Ewwws" and never wants to be near you again...

THE ANSWER

There are really TWO answers to this dilemma.

The first answer is what to do if you're in a condition where you like a certain girl, but you don't know if she likes you back.

DON'T GET HEAVY WITH HER.

Don't get her a big gift and write down a love letter...

Don't mail her ten dozen roses to her work with a not that says "From your secret admirer".

Don't call her three times daily.

And DON'T CONFESS YOUR LOVE for her.

If you desire to identify how she feels about you, KISS HER (and use "The Kiss Test" that you learned on my website and in my book).

As a rule of thumb, don't get any deeper than HER. Use SIGNALS from her to find out how she feels... and if you don't know how to read and generate those signals, then LEARN.

Asking a woman if she's attracted in you in a romantic way, or if you are "her type" will in fact DESTROY the chances that she'll like you.

Really.

The SECOND answer is to not get into this certain situation in the FIRST PLACE. Avoid it all together.

And how does one do that?

One does that by creating ATTRACTION from the very get go.

One does that by comprehending the dynamics of how and why women have the physical and emotional reaction of ATTRACTION triggered.

One does that by knowing what you're doing FROM THE START.

And what's the greatest way to learn THAT skill?

I thought you'd never ask...

The very best method to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you is to get yourself a copy of my e-Book, Double Your Dating.

I've spent numerous years now studying the ways that men who are "naturals" communicate using their words, voice tone, and body language that makes them MAGNETIC to women.

And I'll tell you... it's not magic.

You don't have to be rich, handsome, or young.

And you don't have to be LUCKY.

What you DO have to do is LEARN.

It's a skill, and I sincerely believe that ANY man can learn it if he desires.

But you're not expected to figure it out by “trial and error". Many of the keys to making women feel ATTRACTION aren't "apparent" at all.

In fact, many of them make no sense... and they’re the LAST thing you'd do in any regular situation if you didn't know the SECRETS.

I'm telling you, this book will show you the way. I guarantee that this course will INSTANTLY change how you perform around women.

And it will start getting you results IMMEDIATELY.

In addition, I'd also like to request for you to sign up for my free dating tips newsletter.

It's free, there's no obligation, I'll never share your email address with anyone, and you can simply remove yourself anytime with no hassle (and no, I'll never pull any of these tricks where I send you a bunch of unwanted junk email when you try to remove yourself).

Its JAM PACKED with dozens and dozens of precise strategies for overcoming fear, approaching women, getting phone numbers and email address from women fast, great inexpensive or even free date ideas, and advice on how to take things to a "physical" level smoothly and effortlessly.

If you'd like to take your success with women and dating to the next level, and have the kind of

achievement that you've always desired, then go sign up for my free newsletter, get all the details, and check out some great complimentary samples of the e-Book located here:

 

• Free Dating Tips Newsletter and Download e-Book •

 

And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo


 

 
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