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Be Dominant, Not Domineering 

By: Derek Vitalio


As a man, you need to be decisive and make decisions.

You need to become comfortable with being in charge and in command.

If you want to go to the beach that Sunday, tell your woman, “Let’s go to the beach… and have a barbecue! Quick, get ready.”

If she asks you which pair of shoes looks better for the evening, tell her. Have an opinion. Don’t just say to her, “I don’t know… whatever you like better.”

Women often want to just relax knowing that you have taken care of everything. Being decisive means taking the lead and surprising your woman.

On the other hand, if you’re unable to be decisive and take charge, your woman will feel your weakness and take charge for you. She will start telling YOU what to do, nag you, and try to micromanage you.

Taking charge and being decisive however doesn’t mean taking domineering control over your woman. Taking charge doesn’t mean micromanaging her activities, telling her what to wear all the time, or telling her who she’s allowed to see. It doesn’t mean playing dictator.

You want to be dominant, but not domineering. You want to be strong, and yet sweet.

Nor do you need to create a woman who is subservient. In fact, your woman should not hesitate to offer you her advice based on her experience and feelings.

So do I mean exactly by “take control”?

…taking control does NOT mean being macho.

…taking control does NOT mean belting or popping a woman one when she gets out of line.

…taking control does NOT mean emotionally abusing a woman.

…taking control does NOT mean putting a woman down.

…taking control does NOT mean losing your temper, screaming, or yelling.

And never become brutal or violent physically or verbally with your woman. Creating a Fascist Germany atmosphere with domineering behavior is interpreted by your woman as a form of weakness, and she’ll come to despise you for it. She will lose all respect for you, and rightfully so, because it’s cruel behavior.

A domineering man is unsure of himself. A domineering man is insecure. A domineering man is not the romantic hero women dream of but a thug who resorts to violence for control because he lacks control from the power of his natural charisma.

So while you rightfully want to avoid the, “I’m a desperate super-nice guy, I-have-to-kiss-her-ass-so-that-hopefully-she-likes-me” behavior, this doesn’t mean you want to make the mistake of being domineering either.

Always demonstrate that you are gentle, sensitive, loving, and caring. Many men make the mistake of believing that being nice means being a pushover. It’s not. You still want to nice and loving to your woman, just not in a placating way, but from the position of taking command and being a man of action.

So you have to take control over the situation without losing control over yourself. You want to be able to be in control of any situation without resorting to any sort of domineering behavior. Being in control and being decisive simply means that you are a man of action, that you have direction, and are comfortable taking control when the moment arises.

If you want to better improve your relationships with women – after all, some of them you want to keep AFTER the seduction – you’ll want to check out my Blissnosis Master Program. Blissnosis teaches you how to become the lover that women really want, how to keep a woman locked into a relationship, and how to fulfill your fantasies with women. It’s all there.

Until next time,


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