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How to Call A Woman and Ask Her Out

By: David DeAngelo


I have a question for you...


When you get a hold of a woman's number and you're picking up the phone to call and "ask her out", does it trouble you?


Do you get anxious?


Do you get nervous?


Do you start thinking about precisely what you're going to say, how you're going to say it, how to deal with her rejecting you... etc.?


Do you ever get EDGY when you're dialing the phone?


You know that sensation when you just start getting nervous for no rational reason, and you just CAN'T have power over it?


Have you ever had to essentially HANG UP because you were so damn freaked out... and you just couldn't follow through with it?


OK, now a different set of interesting questions...


Have you ever called a woman, and started talking to her, only to grasp that she was in a COMPLETELY different frame of mind from the last time?


Have you ever had a woman "turn cold" on you unexpectedly?


It's almost like you're talking to a different person from the girl you met just a day or two before... and it makes no sense to you... right?


And finally...


Have you ever worked up the courage to call, gotten her on the phone, had an immense conversation, but when it came time to ask her out, you choked because you didn't know what to say?


Or even worse, have you ever gotten to the conclusion of the conversation and asked her out, only to have her respond with:


"Well, maybe... call me Friday afternoon... OK?"




"Actually, I'm going to be busy all this week, but thanks for asking... (silence)"




Have you ever had one of those conversations where you could just TELL that something wasn't correct... and that she wasn't going to be taking you up on your date, or calling you back at all sometime soon?


So, why all the problems?


What is it about these fussy few minutes of time that continually ends in problems for guys?


I personally think that this subject comes down to a few key DEEPER ISSUES.


And I think that if you don't have these other issues "under control", you're going to keep running into troubles... and NEVER even know WHY...


...which sucks.


I mean, it's bad enough to keep having a fussy problem and not figure out how to answer it... but the idea that the resolution is in doing something you would never think of is a little bit maddening.


In other words, I think that this is all about comprehending the problem, and actually PREVENTING it from coming up... rather than trying to "solve it" in the instant.


Let me put it this way...


If you're dialing the phone, and you're starting to feel uneasy, then it's already too late to work out the problem.


No swift fix will help you.


Or if you're on the phone with her and you have just asked her out on a date, and she replies "Um, let me call you back in a few days and tell you"... and you start to get that plummeting feeling because you know she's blowing you off... IT'S TOO LATE.


There's no "magic pill" at this end.


The answer is PREVENTION.




So let's take a few minutes and talk about the problems and what CAUSES them.


Here are some of the "origin causes", and how I perceive them...


1) Having no other options.


If you're sitting at the phone with ONE phone number in your hand, and you haven't been out on a date in a long time, and you are feeling distressed, you're probably going to get VERY jumpy.


When you have no other options, the solitary one in front of you becomes VERY precious.


Translation: You want it TOO badly.


This AUTOMATICALLY sets off your emotional system, because at some level you understand that if you screw this up, it's all over. And you know that it's all about to happen in just a few SECONDS.


The pressure is too much!


2) Putting too much weight on a single girl.


Now, if you have a girl that you've been dating for six months, and you've determined that she's one in a million, it makes common sense to put a lot of importance on your relationship with her.


But if you don't know a girl very well, or you haven't even dated her at all, then you are only setting yourself up for major dissatisfaction by putting too much importance on ANY girl.


3) Thinking you need to IMPRESS her.


This is a HUGE mistake.


Most men "unconsciously" act and communicate like they're trying to IMPRESS the woman of their wishes.


When you think about this, it only makes sense... of course you'd want to make an impression to the woman you like... so she'll think you're a chill guy and want to be with you.


But have you ever thought for a moment how an exciting, attractive woman sees it when a guy is TRYING to IMPRESS her?


Well, here's the INSTANT and UNCONSCIOUS reply that women have:


"He's trying to hard. There's something wrong. This guy must have something he's trying to hide... and he must be pretty unconfident."


In other words, the INSTANT you do something or say something that is an obvious attempt at impressing a woman, her radar system screams:




4) Having high expectations and being emotionally involved to them.


You might think of this one as a variant of "wanting it too much"... only somewhat different.


When you start getting your hopes and expectations up, you begin to get ATTACHED to them.


Then you run the danger of HOLDING ON TOO FIRM to your little dream.


Bad idea.


Women don't date guys who presume too much, act too comfortable, or fall for them too quickly.


Remember, beautiful women have guys falling for them left and right.


In fact, they almost WAIT FOR guys to go out on one or two dates with them, then say "You know, I really like you..." and other equally unsurprising sentiments.


Just like being desperate can demolish your chances with a woman, liking a woman too much, too fast, and creating expectations leads to crazy, dim-witted mistakes as well.


Now, think over what I just said...


I'm basically saying that if you want to treat the problem of freaking out when you call women to ask them out, and the problem of screwing it up when you have that primary conversation and ask them out the first time, then you have to go INSIDE first... and do some pre-emptive maintenance on yourself.


And the GOOD NEWS is that this stuff is not only good for you, it also helps you get even MORE dates with attractive women.


So here's what to do about this particular problem:


1) Get more options.


If you go out one night with a couple of friends, and you meet a REALLY hot girl... and you end up having a fun conversation, and getting her number, what should you do?


RIGHT! Go get at least ONE MORE girl's number. Extra, if you can.


This way, when you're picking up the phone to call (or sending out emails, or whatever), you've got another woman to call right after her...


In other words, if it doesn't go well, no big deal. No sweat at all.


Instead of putting all your "hopes" in this one state, go get more options... this will stop many problems, as well as giving you more women to date!


And think about it... when are you MOST likely to get a woman's phone number? When are you the most likely to be in a great mood that in fact ATTRACTS women?


Exactly... in the moments after you've already gotten another woman's number.


So take benefit of this time!


2) Dial the phone expecting it to NOT work out with this girl.


I have news for you: Most women have something about their character, behavior, future plans, etc. that is going to ban them from being good "potential mates" for you.


Now, I'm not saying that "all women are screwed up", etc.


What I AM saying is that you need to understand that the only reason you're freaking out so much is because your EMOTIONS are running the show.


You need to think about how rare it is that you actually meet a girl that is well-suited for you... that you'd enjoy spending time with even if she wasn’t good-looking.


If you have this in mind as you're dialing the phone, you won't have that "I'm hopeless" vibe going on.


You won't be talking like a guy who has a gun to his head, either... which is a good thing... because women get freaked-out by this kind of thing.


3) Instead of asking a woman out, tell her what you're doing, and then tell her she can come along if she wants.


Why is "asking a woman out" early on an awful idea? Because if you don't have a world-class understanding of male/female dynamics, you're going to come across as a guy who is trying to use food as date-bait.


In other words, if the primary thing out of your mouth is "I'd like to take you out to dinner" it's going to be interpreted as "I don't think you're probably going to acknowledge an invitation to spend time with me unless I throw in something more...".




And that's how SHE sees it.


The alternative?


Tell her that you're going to be doing something, and that she should join you.


"Hey, I'm going to go down to Starbucks and get a cup of coffee. You should come along. I'm way more fun than whatever else you were going to do... and that's a fact!"


Extra bonus points:


Hint that she's missing out if she doesn't agree to it immediately.


If she hems and haws, or hesitates... just stop and say "Hey, you're the one who's missing out".


I also like "You know, never mind. I guess you don't like to have fun...".


Great stuff!


This is rock-solid Cocky & Funny material, and it's the right time to use it.


You know, I personally used to get extremely freaked out when calling women for the first time on the phone... and "asking them out".


Now that I appreciate this particular "moment in time" better, and now that I recognize more of the "dynamics" of what's going on, I get MUCH better results personally...


In fact, I never get "anxious" anymore when calling women, and I rarely if EVER have a woman "flake out" on me.


Now, in this article I've shared a few points to help you get better results in this particular area. Use them. They'll certainly help you.


You should read this article right before you call the next 10 women you meet... in fact.


But as you can probably tell, this is just one of MANY important facets of success with women.


In fact, this is just scratching the outer surface of the skills you'll need if you want to have STEADY success with the most DESIRABLE women.


The reality of this circumstance is that if you want to take control of this area of your life, and not walk powerless with women anymore, you're going to need to take more steps to get yourself skilled on this topic.


And what's the best way to do that rapidly, easily, and without spending years of time and lots of money learning the HARD WAY?


My eBook: Double Your Dating.


It will take you step-by-step through all the key theories, concepts, and techniques you'll need to start meeting and dating more women starting as SOON as you finish my book!


And here's another motivating benefit that comes from going through my eBook...




The first time you read it, you'll be hitting your head saying "Ah ha! Ah ha!" the whole time.


All of those things that have happened to you with women will start to make sense.


All of the times you messed up will stop bothering you, because you'll "get" what happened... and all of the times that things worked will also make sense.


Of course, you'll also be shaking your head as you learn some of the most astonishing techniques for approaching women, getting numbers, getting dates, and taking things to a more "physical level" that have ever been fashioned (For example, I share some of my own personal favorite "pick up lines" that work better than anything I've ever heard of for approaching women... and I don't share these anywhere else except my audio and video programs and intensive live seminars).


But one of the REAL benefits comes AFTER you go all the way through it. This is when the real MAGIC starts to happen.


When you're out at restaurants watching the couple at the next table, you'll appreciate what is happening.


When a woman starts doing something delicate that you would have never noticed before, you'll SEE it... and she'll SEE that you see it... and you will right away be talking to her on a DIFFERENT LEVEL... all because you know something that most other guys don't.


When you come across "resistance" or "problems" or "tests" from women, you will no longer need to get worried or upset, because you'll know what TO DO about it... and when you actually DO the right thing you'll see that problem vanish.


The point that I'm trying to make is that this education will not only teach you techniques for meeting women, it will also give you a new POWER that you never had before.


I can truthfully say to you that if this plan were available five or so years ago when I started learning this stuff, I would have gladly traded ANYTHING I owned for it... or paid any sum of money.


But it wasn't, so I had to take YEARS figuring all of this stuff out for myself.


This eBook is priceless, and it's worth at least ten times what I sell it for. As you most likely know, you can purchase it WITHOUT RISK as well.


Order and try it out. If you're not pleased, just say "no thanks" and I'll refund your money. No questions, no hassles.


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Click the link below for all of the details, and be sure to sign up for my newsletter at-no-charge while you're at it:




I'll talk to you again soon.



Your Friend,



David D.


David DeAngelo is the writer of "Double Your Dating - What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women", and has trained thousands of men how to be more thriving with women and dating.

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